OK so it is 2:00am and I can not sleep! Why you ask? well I took some Excedrin and it has caffeine in it so now I can't sleep. I took the Excedrin because my butt hurts.
I am sorry to be writing a post that is complaining but I am super frustrated and I just need to vent, so please feel free so skip if you want.
Ever since I got pregnant with Linus I have had problems with my sciatic nerve. It not only causes pain in my butt but the pain radiates up my back, in my hips and down my leg and wraps around my knee. This makes it hard for me to run, in fact it makes it impossible.
I ran a whole 2 miles on Saturday and have been in terrible pain just from the damn nerve. Ya a whole whopping 2 miles and I had to stop and stretch like 5 times. I am used to running a 6 miles at a time, but now I was lucky to get 2 in and even then I had to stop and walk because of the pain and it was only going to make it worse.
I had "Dr. Fix it" give me a cortisone shot and then he showed me all these special stretches and stuff but NOTHING is working. I am super frustrated and starting to feel like I will never run again. My mom even mentioned that ( I know super uplifting huh?).
This is really depressing to me because running has sort have been my identity since I was young. It was what defined me and my family, as well as what kept me bonded to my dad. Now I just feel like if I don't have that I lose a big part of me and who I am. What else defines me? I am not really good at anything else, nor do I enjoy anything else as much as I do running.
I want to be able to do it now more than ever too. I need that break from kids. I always love getting outside and just running in nature and listening to music, it is some of my most favorite memories.
I have all these friends, and friends in my ward starting to run and they are doing races and talking about doing marathons and I am so jealous because that is what I had hoped to be doing at this point in my life. I just don't know what else to do.
Anyways I am sorry to my a downer and write a sappy "poor me" post I am just super frustrated.
8 comments:
Ah Kelly!!! That sucks the cortisone didn't work. I wonder if you do some research if you can find a miracle doctor.
I'm sorry Kel! I understand your love for running and that it is a big part of who you are. Even if you aren't able to run you will always have that. Also it isn't the only thing that defines you! Though it is a big part of who you are you are SO many other things! An awesome Mom, Wife and My Best Friend are just a few of those things! If you ever want to talk just give me a call. I don't do much anymore! It just sucks that now that I just sit on my butt I am so far away!
Hey Kelly, I would be mortified if I couldn't play hockey anymore. It is who I have been and who I am. I hope that it is something that can get better so you can run again! I had trouble with butt pain and numbness in my legs but not as severe as yours.
Nick's butt pain came from me kicking it so much. I'm nice to kelly :)
Kelly I am soo sorry about your sciatica. I have that too! It's nooooo fun! I am also sorry about you not being able to do what you love. But I want you to know that is not all your are good at... you are a good mom, creative, your voice overs are soo awesome, and you are you!!! Good Luck!
Sorry to hear that Kelly. Hang in there I am sure you will be able to run if given enough time. I will keep you in my prayers. But pain so doesn't sound fun.
Oops! I meant *butt pain :)
i'm sorry kelly :( i hope you can find something that will help. don't they say that sometimes the first cortisone shot can not work and thats normal?
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